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5 Things triathletes are sick of hearing

When you do finally get us out for some social time ... things we'd prefer not to discuss

People just don’t get it. It’s not easy being a triathlete. There’s lots of training. Then there’s the challenge of fitting all that training around work, family and those pesky friends who keep wanting us to stop training for a bit and spend some time with them. So when you do finally get us out, here are a few things not to say:

Why are you going to bed so early?

There are actually five components to the training for this sport. Swim, bike, run, eat and recover. Besides the fact that we’re simply cooked by the end of the day, there is the issue that we have a 6 AM workout in the morning. Which means at least a 5 AM start since we’ll have to eat before we head out the door. So, no, we’re not children and we don’t suffer from narcolepsy. We’re just tired.

Why do you shave your legs?

 

 

Yeah, actually, we guy triathletes understand this one. We remember the first time we said “I’ll be in the shower for a bit – I have to shave my legs.” It still feels weird. For some of us we shave our legs because we remember how bad the road rash was for that bike crash we had when we did have hair on our legs. For others its the ease of clean up after a massage – there’s nothing like having all that oil gooped up in hairy legs. But, really, for most of us its because all the other cool triathletes shave their legs. So, just accept that we’re going to do this and move on.

All you do is train.

 

 

That’s not true. Most of us work, too. And we spend lots of time reading up on the latest training tools that will make us faster. Then there’s times like these, where we do have some social time, and we can tell you all about our training and racing.

Related: 10 signs that made us laugh in a race when we really wanted to cry

My (friend/ cousin/ brother-in-law etc.) did an Ironman, too

 

 

Just so we’re clear: an Ironman is a full-distance triathlon. It consists of a 3.8 km swim, a 180 km bike and a 42.2 km run. It is not the Try-A-Tri at the lake just up the road from your cottage. It’s not even the Olympic distance event that friend/ cousin/ brother-in-law or whatever trained an entire summer for. It is way longer than that.

But, if they actually did do an Ironman … what’s their name? What age group are they in? Did they qualify for Kona? What bike are they riding? Do they use a pedal- or crank power meter?

How much does it cost to do triathlons?

 

 

Yes, its a lot. A tri bike is expensive. Have you seen how much the top of the line wetsuits are going for these days? Don’t even get me started on the latest race wheels. We know it’s a lot. But we don’t ask you how much that pure-bred Samoyed ($4,000 to $11,000) cost you. Nor do we ask how much you paid for your new Tesla. (We have the decency to go home and look it up.)